Monday, September 7, 2020

Family Meeting

Part of our survival strategy during COVID is to have family meetings.  During these times we try to resolve conflicts, agree upon expectations about chores, clarify family policies about online behavior etc.  Now, remember that my husband and I as well as our two 9th grade girls are all raging extroverts and these meetings are places where strong opinions and emotions are being unfurled so you really have to bring your A-game.  Your mind has to be sharp and your timing has to be ON or else you might not get any airspace or you might lose precious time in an endless bunny trail of random disagreements.  I've led a lot of meetings in my life and our family meetings are pretty much the zenith of leadership challenge.  If you lose concentration for a split second, you are bound to lose control and someone will end up leaving the room or crying.  

We were having one of those highly tension filled meetings in our living room when Josh sauntered out of his room and plopped down next to his sister.  We all stopped for a second because Josh does not usually join in on these meetings.  He had his headphones on, his ipad in hand and seemed pretty happy so we just continued on with our meeting agenda. 

At one point, the emotional tension was really starting to build.  I can't remember what the topic was but there was considerable disagreement about it.  Things that were being said by one person were taken as seriously offensive to another family member.  I wondered for a second if this was going to be one of those meetings that we have to halt and come back to later.  

But just at the right moment, Josh entered the conversation by echoing something that was said a few minutes earlier in the conversation.  

"That's totally inappropriate!"

The rest of us stopped, looked at each other and couldn't help but to laugh.  

"That's totally inappropriate!"  

"Joshie, is it totally inappropriate?" I asked my sweet boy.

"Yes." He said, very calmly, focused on this ipad.  

That little moment of levity was all we needed.  We were able to finish our meeting and iron out our differences with much more calmness.  Josh had been just the special guest consultant that we needed to survive another meeting with teen girls who are trying their best to survive a pandemic (and their frazzled parents).  

(This is not from a family meeting but another time where we were just hanging out together.)